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Because of this, discussing birth control, including emergency contraception, is crucial. Plus, for a whole host of reasons, lesbian, gay and bisexual teens are actually have a greater likelihood for teen pregnancy than youth in the general population. Though there is a temptation to remind lesbian youth to stock up on dental dams, or to focus on anal sex with gay teens, the range of sex acts an adolescent might participate in aren’t defined by their sexual orientation or gender identity.įor example, plenty of gay men never have anal sex, and plenty of lesbian teens do. Having a conversation where you acknowledge the vast range of ways to express sexual orientation and gender that doesn’t only focus on sex acts can send a positive message about your views of your child’s relationship to this aspect of who they are.Ģ) Talk About Specific Sex Acts, Not About Lesbian or Gay Sex Still many people default to focusing on the sex side.Īnd while sex will likely be a part of your child’s life at some point, and one that is probably going to be colored by their sexual orientation or gender identity, if that kid is on the younger side, it is very possible that sex with another person won’t be on the table for a while.
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Yet for plenty of queer kids, this is more related to identity and community than it is to sexual behavior. So, here are 5 things parents of LGBT teens can keep in mind when gearing up for the sex talk.ġ) Don’t Assume a Teen’s Sexual Orientation or Gender Identity Is Just About “Sex.”Ī lot of people confuse sexual orientation and gender identity with sexual activity.
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I was thinking back on this conversation recently, since while the issue of how to talk to our kids about sex can be a complicated one for everyone, for parents of queer youth, doing so can raise some additional issues. She was struggling with how to offer support, get him needed information, and do so without making the whole experience super uncomfortable. This mom explained that she felt ill equipped to talk to her son about sex given his revelation. She was a nurse and there professionally, but the reason she wanted to talk was that her 14-year-old son had just come out as gay, and she was terrified that he was now at greater risk for HIV. After the presentation, a woman approached me. The following article was originally published on The Parents Project, a first-of-its-kind digital space for parents, teachers, and caretakers of LGBTQIA young people, and cross-posted here with permission.Ī number of years ago, I was at a conference where I gave a presentation on the challenges LGBT+ kids face accessing accurate information online.